Secrets Are Never Fun
by BrendaBanner1234
Summary: Since Rowen Potter was four years old she has kept a secret from everyone and has fooled everyone into belief. Now though, when finally at Hogwarts she discovers she still must keep this awful secret. With actual friends to help her will she be able to survive a school of magic...a school she didn't even know existed? What about a world? Fem!Harry everyone just sayin! REDONE!
1. Horrible Beginnings

**I am sorry for taking so long. I've been trying to redo this story because I saw all the mistakes I made. I am also trying to redo my story, MY Little Girl. I'm going to try and update My Little Girl once every week and this one every two weeks at most. I'm going to have help thanks to GoldenPhoenix823, my beta.**

**If I see more people liking this story, then I'll try and update it every week, like the other one. I have a lot going on, but I am trying to get better about my updating.**

**Anyway, for this story I have a poll up about whom Rowen will fall in love with. By the end of MY Little Girl, this poll will be over. **

**Oh and I am switching this back to a T story. I don't want to go into the M rated stuff for my own personal reasons. This story and my other story really hit home for me.**

**If you have any questions about this story or my other one, please message me. Also do not forget to review! I love all reviews, I'll even accept flames. So, Enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: I (unfortunately) cannot claim ownership of Harry Potter (no matter how sexy the characters are) but Rowen is my character so if you steal her, FEEL MY WRATH!**

**[Rowen]**

My name is Rowen Holly Potter and I am a freak.

My story is not a happy one, it is a tale of lies and deception, of hatred and grief but in order for you to understand it I must start from the beginning. Not my birth, but the beginning of the end of my life, or what I thought would be.

I was four, almost five years old, when it happened, I was sitting in my cupboard, crying. Uncle Vernon hurt me again. He often did, but never before had he gone this far, although later on I would be shown that he could and _would _go further.

I was huddled in a tight ball clutching my arm to my chest, as I tried desperately to stem the flow of blood oozing from my wound, but to no avail, the front of my shirt was already soaked with the crimson liquid. Tears of agony were streaming down my face, however, I remained perfectly silent, I was obviously in shock. Uncle Vernon had hurt me again, He often did, but never before had he gone this far. I honestly couldn't believe that he would ever do something like this. Don't get me wrong, though, I understood why he would, he was frightened of me, of what I could do to him and his family, even though I had no control over it.

Throughout my life, I had always done things that I could never explain. Things that I would be punished for, no matter how many times I apologized and swore I would never do again. Like the day, my cousin, Dudley, and his friends, had chased me around the day care center with the intention of beating me up when they caught me, in attempt to get away from them I leapt behind a cluster of trashcans and found myself on the roof. The instructors told my uncle of the incident and I was thrown into my cupboard for three days without food.

I never understood how or why I did the things I did, all I knew was that I was a freak because of it, and freaks can never be loved.

The day care workers were always irritated and wary of me, and the Dursley's hated me, something they made sure to make very clear on a daily basis.

The neighbors think I'm strange too. I can tell by the way the look in their eyes, when they look at me they see a too skinny girl with long tangled red hair, dull green eyes, and sickly pale skin and instantly assume that I'm not in my right mind, a rumor Uncle Vernon was quick to encourage.

I'm getting to off track though, back to that day.

I don't know how long I spent in my cupboard, the blood loss was making me woozy and unable to think properly, however, when the door to my cupboard opened, I cringed away. Was Uncle Vernon back to finish the job? Was he here to kill me? He wasn't. It was Aunt Petunia, but to my surprise she didn't yell or hit me, all she did was stare.

I didn't say anything for fear of being punished, then I saw the look in her eyes. She was staring at me with pity and… sadness. For a moment I felt hope, was she going to finally show me the love I had craved since arriving at the Dursleys? But then her eyes went cold and I flinched.

"Come here," she whispered harshly, frightened of further punishment, I complied.

She grabbed me by good arm and dragged me from the cupboard and upstairs to the bathroom, all the while I made sure to keep any blood from dripping onto the floor. Uncle Vernon wouldn't appreciate that.

Aunt Petunia sat me on the edge of the bathtub, then pulled out a first aid kit "Arm" she ordered, I was scared of what she was going to do, but I held out my bleeding arm anyway. Roughly, she began to clean it. I whimpered, when the wound on my arm throbbed painfully, but didn't struggle, I didn't want her to stop healing me.

Slowly the blood was cleaned away, revealing the fresh wound carved into my forearm, a single word.

FREAK.

I heard Aunt Petunia's breath hitch, and when I looked up saw tears in her eyes. Why would she cry for me? She hated me.

Slowly she finished wrapping the wound and gave me back my arm along with a clean set of clothing.

"A-Aunt P-Petunia? Why?" I whispered after I had changed into the new clothes.

I should not have spoken. I had forgotten the rule. I had forgotten the most important rule of the Dursley household: Do not ask questions.

Instantly an almost evil look flashed in her eyes. I cried out as she grabbed my head and threw me into the bathtub. She turned on the water and began messing with my hair.

I tried to free myself from her grasp, but she slapped me in the back, making me almost howl in pain. Uncle Vernon had hurt my back only a few days ago ago, and it was still healing.

"Stay still!" she shouted. I stilled, now only focused on trying to make sure water didn't go up my nose. I heard cutting and I felt Aunt Petunia rubbing something in my hair.

I could also hear her muttering.

"She's not her" she said "The little freak only looks like her. She's dead, the bitch is dead. I'll show the freaks. She isn't her,"

It truly terrified me. She never cursed, ever and to hear her muttering like a mad woman, it frightened me.

After what felt like hours, she made a small noise of approval and stepped away from me. "That should do it…" she muttered.

Slowly, I lifted my wet head up and stared at my reflection. I choked on my scream.

My red hair, my pretty red hair was gone. In its place was ugly black hair that was cut so short, I looked like a boy.

She made me face her and despite the tears pouring down my face she gave me a sickly sweet smile.

"Your name…is Harry James Potter" she said sweetly, poking a finger at me.

"B-But I'm R-Row-" I tried to stutter out, but she slapped me across the face. The tears poured faster.

"I_said_…your name is Harry. James. Potter" she spat at me. Then she put on that sickly sweet smile again.

"Now...what is your name?" she asked sweetly, but I knew it was anything but. I wasn't as stupid as Dursley were led to believe I was.

Nonetheless I sighed and said "My n-name is Harry..."Aunt Petunia patted my head roughly before pulling me down the stairs.

"When's the girl making dinner, love?" Uncle Vernon asked Aunt Petunia.

"The boy, darling," she corrected him as she dragged me into the living room. Uncle Vernon and Dudley turned to us, their eyes wide.

"The boy..." Uncle Vernon said looking to Aunt Petunia.

"No one has truly seen her. They'll forget about her and know only him." She explained, then elbowed me in the side, an obvious cue.

"M-My name i-is Harry J-James Potter," I whispered, broken and defeated.

There was a moment of silence, then "Go and make dinner, boy!" Uncle Vernon shouted.

And so my fate was sealed.

My name is Harry James Potter and I am a freak.


	2. Years Later, Still The Same

**Again, this is an updated version of this chapter because I realized all the stupid mistakes I made so I had to redo it. Oh, and don't forget the poll on my profile that will decide who Rowen/Harry will fall in love with. Yes, this is a Fem!Harry if any were confused.**

**If you have any questions, please message me. I would also love reviews and I will even accept flames. So, Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not claim ownership of Harry Potter, no matter how sexy some of the characters are, but I do claim ownership of Rowen so if you steal her, FEEL MY WRATH!**

**["Harry"]**

It's been six years since I became the boy I am today. Six long years since I just gave up and let them use me as a doormat. The only thing that had changed was that, now that I am older, I have more chores and am responsible for making my hair black whenever the red starts to show.

In all honesty, I kind of preferred being a boy. It was easier…except for the times when I look in the mirror, for those few seconds I only feel shame.

I was so good at pretending, even Dudley forgot about…her. But Vernon never did. Oh how I wished he had. I curled up in my fragile sheets, thinking of that monster. The only reason he didn't…was because I was a freak. He didn't want to get infected. That didn't mean he wouldn't do other stuff, besides beating me.

Outside of my cupboard, I could hear Petunia bustling about in the kitchen. Why was she up so early? And what was she doing in the kitchen? Usually I was the one who made the food.

My musing were cut short when she came into the hallway and rapped on my cupboard door, "Up! Get up now!" she shrieked, she rapped on the door again. "Get up boy!" then she went back to the kitchen.

Groaning, I rolled onto my back and looked to the ceiling of my cupboard, trying to remember the dream I had last night. It seemed so real, I was in the arms of a man, but I couldn't remember who. We were on a motorcycle, and it was flying.

I must have taken too long daydreaming, as Petunia was now back outside my door. "Are you up?" she asked angrily.

"Nearly" I said through the door, trying to fight back any sarcasm in my voice.

"Well get a move on, I want you to look after the bacon. And don't you dare let it burn, I want everything perfect for Duddy's birthday" she said.

I groaned again, now understanding why she was cooking. How could I have forgotten that little bastard's birthday?

"What did you say?" she shrieked.

"Nothing…I said nothing…" I told her and she walked away from my cupboard.

Slowly, I got up from my bed and looked for a pair of semi-clean socks. I pulled a spider out of one before putting it on. I was used to spiders so they didn't bother me. They were always in my cupboard. They were like my own little eight legged friends, the only friends I had.

When I was dressed I left my cupboard and walked into the kitchen, and was immediately absolutely disgusted by the fact that Dudley's present almost completely covered the table. It seems he got that stupid computer he wanted along with his _second_ television and a racing bike.

Why the fat lard wanted anything to do with that I wouldn't know, he hates anything involving exercise. Well, he liked punching and I was his favorite punching bag. But that was only when he could catch me, I looked scrawny, but I was very fast.

I had always been tiny for a kid my age, and the fact that I was always dressed in It Dudley's old clothes, which were at least four sizes to big, only made me look scrawnier. I had a thin face along with knobby knees, I also had short black hair, although it was really supposed to be red, and my emerald green eyes. Of course, there were also my round glasses that I wore, they were held together in the middle by scotch tape because they had broken from all of the times Vernon and Dudley punched me in the face.

The only thing I actually liked about myself was the scar on my forehead. It was shaped like a lightning bolt and I'd had it my entire life. Once, when I was younger, I'd asked how I'd gotten it Petunia told me it was from the car crash that had killed my parents before she punished me for asking questions.

That was the day started I learned the number one rule: Don't ask questions.

I was in the kitchen, flipping the bacon when Vernon came in. I knew because a chill went down my spine. That always went happened when Vernon was near, it was like my body was warning me to be careful.

"Comb your hair!" he shouted as a greeting. It wasn't like it mattered. Once a week Vernon told me this and despite the many haircuts I got, my hair was perpetually messy.

I was finishing the eggs when Dudley hobbled into the kitchen, closely followed by Petunia.

Dudley looked a lot like Vernon, a fat lard of a boy, with a flap of blond hair resting on the top of his head and a pair of beady blue eyes. Or pig in a wig as I thought of him in the privacy of my own head. In the beginning, I'd hoped that Dudley would grow to become a better man than his father, but with the way things were going, I figured that wouldn't be the case.

I put the bacon and eggs on the table, distributing some to each of the Dursley's, although that was made difficult considering there was almost no room. Dudley had yet to notice the food in front of him, as he was too busy counting his presents, with some difficulty, I might add.

"Thirty-six," He finally concluded "That's two less than last year!"

Again, I felt disgusted with the fat lard in front of me. "Dudley you haven't counted Auntie Marge's. It's under the big one from mommy and daddy," Petunia said.

"All-right thirty seven then." He said, but was still frowning. I knew one of his tantrums was coming so I went to the counter and began to eat the two slices of thin toast I had with my glass of milk. Petunia must have been in a good mood. I rarely was given milk that wasn't spoiled.

Petunia must have seen it too because she quickly walked over to her precious pig "And we'll buy two more present while were out today. How's that popkins? Two more presents?" she placated. I hid my look of disgust behind my glass of milk.

"So I'll have thirty…thirty…" Dudley struggled to add in his head

"Thirty-nine sweetums." Petunia offered.

I rolled my eyes. Trying to be dumber than him was so hard that I had given up on that and took the beating I got every time reports were sent home, and my grades ended up better than hers.

"All right then." Dudley said, moving to open his first present of the day.

Vernon chuckled "Little tyke wants his money's worth. Just like his dad. 'Atta boy Dudley." he praised.

The phone rang and Petunia went to get it while Vernon and I watched Dudley open his presents. He got the racing bike, he'd wanted, along with a video camera, a remote control airplane, sixteen new computer games, and a VCR. While he was unwrapping a gold wristwatch, Petunia came back, looking like she's swallowed a lemon.

"Bad news. Mrs. Figg's broken her leg. She can't take him." she said, jerking her head towards me.

Dudley opened his mouth in horror while, mentally, I jumped for joy. Every year, while Petunia and Vernon took Dudley and his friends to all kinds of fun places on his birthday, I was stuck with Mrs. Figg who made me look at countless photographs of her stupid cats.

"Now what?" Petunia asked, glaring at me. I should feel sorry for Mrs. Figg, but she did not really like me anyway. And now I won't have to look at those cats for another year.

"We could phone Marge." Vernon suggested. Hell no! I'd run away before I stayed somewhere alone with that woman.

"Don't be silly Vernon, she hates him" Petunia said. I sighed in relief.

"What about your friend-Yvonne?" he asked. Ok, her I could deal with. She was pretty alright, for being a friend of Petunia.

"On vacation in Majorca." Petunia snapped. Dang it.

"You could just leave me here." I told them. Hopefully I could raid the fridge for some real food. Maybe even watch some TV.

"And come back to find the house in ruins?" Petunia snapped. "I won't-" I tried to say, but gave up in the end. Not like she would listen.

"I suppose we could take him to the zoo" Petunia said. What? "And leave him in the car." Oh, yeah that sounds like her. "That car is brand new, I'm not leaving the freak in it" Vernon said. Thanks jackass.

Dudley then began to cry. Well, not really cry. If Dudley just screwed up his face and wailed, he could get anything he wanted from Petunia.

"Diddy Duddydums, don't cry! Mommy won't let him spoil your special day." She said, hugging him. "I…don't want…h-h-him…to come!" Dudley yelled between pretend sobs. "He always sp-spoils everything!" He yelled, giving me a nasty look from behind Petunia's back.

At that moment the doorbell rang, announcing the rival of Dudley's friend Piers, immediately he stopped crying.

Half an hour later I found myself stuck between the two boys, on our way to the zoo. Of course, before I had even gotten into the car Vernon pulled me aside to threa-_warn _me "I'm warning you, boy" he spat, grabbing my arms and pulling me close. A shiver went down my spine. "Any funny business and you'll be beaten an inch of your life and then locked in your cupboard till Christmas."

I had never done anything on purpose, but strange things always happened whenever I was upset. Like when Petunia had nearly made me bald when trying to cut my hair. My hair had grown back within a day. Or like when Dudley's revolting sweater had gotten too big for him and she tried to put it on me. It shrunk so small it couldn't fit on me, luckily Petunia blamed it on the wash instead of me. Then, of course, there was the incident when I had found myself on the daycare centers roof all those years ago. But this time, I had to make sure nothing went wrong. I had too.

While Vernon drove he complained to Petunia. He complained about a number of things: people at work, me, the council, me, the bank, and me were some of his favorite things to complain about. However, today it was motorcycles.

"…roaring around like maniacs, the young fools…" he said. I remembered the dream from last night, but didn't dare say anything. The other most important rule in the Dursley's home was to not talk about anything acting the way it shouldn't, it didn't matter if it was a dream or cartoon. The Dursley's didn't let me watch them anyway. They thought it would give me dangerous ideas.

The beginning of the day was actually pretty good. When Dudley and Piers were ordering themselves ice cream at a little stand at the entrance to the zoo, the ice cream lady noticed me asked what I wanted. Vernon, reluctantly, bought me a cheap lemon ice pop, and it wasn't half bad. I was enjoying it, while watching a gorilla that looked an awful lot like Dudley. After that I made sure to steer clear of Dudley and Piers in case they got bored and wanted to hit me, until we had lunch, Dudley had a tantrum about how his knickerbocker glory didn't have enough ice cream so I got that one while he got a new one.

Of course, I should have known it would be too good to last.

After lunch we all made our way to the reptile house, Dudley instantly found the biggest snake there and ran over to it. It could have wrapped its body around the car twice and crushed it into nothing.

Vernon tried to make it move on Dudley's request, but it didn't work and they went to see something else.

I looked to the snake and slowly it opened its eyes and stared at me. "I'm sorry you have to go through that." I told the snake. It gave me a look that clearly said, "I get that all the time."

"I know. It must be annoying." I murmured. I thought it wouldn't be able to hear me, but the snake nodded. "Where are you from?" I asked cocking my head. The snake jabbed its tail to the sign that read _**Brazil**_. "Was it nice there?" the snake jabbed again. _**This boa constrictor was bred in the zoo**_**.** "I'm sorry. I'm kind of like that too. I at least hope you don't go through what I do,"

The snake cocked its head as if it was confused.

"DUDLEY! MR. DURSLEY! COME AND LOOK AT THIS SNAKE! YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT IT'S DOING!" Piers yelled. Dudley and Vernon ran over and punched me in the ribs to get me out of the way, landing me on the floor. I was so angry. I was so tired of them! Then it.

The next second Piers and Dudley jumped back in horror. The glass was gone. The snake uncoiled and slithered past them as people began to scream. As the snake past me I thought I heard it say, "Brazil here I come. Thanks…_**amiga**_."

I tensed. Amiga was the _female_ form of friend. How did it know?

The keeper of the reptile house was in shock. "But the glass," he kept saying, "where did the glass go?"

When they were leaving, Dudley and Piers kept saying they had barely escaped with their lives. Then the worst thing happened. "Harry was talking to it, weren't you Harry." Piers said.

Vernon instantly turned to me and I tensed up, staring at him terrified. Vernon didn't do anything until after Piers had left their house. Instantly he grabbed me by the hair and dragged me out of the house and into the garden shed. I tried to crawl away, but he grabbed me and forced me to the ground.

He ripped my shirt off, and I covered my slowly developing chest with my arms in fear, he was that kind of man. I heard him take off his belt I thought the worst. He wouldn't

"YOU LITTLE BITCH!" he shouted. Thank God…he was just going to beat me.

Instantly the belt hit hard across my back, but I didn't cry out. That would only make it worse. "WE SHOULD HAVE NEVER KEPT YOU!" _**smack**_ "WE SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOU!" _**smack**_ "YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL LOWLIFE" _**smack**_ "JUST LIKE YOUR PARENTS!" _**smack**_ "WE ASKED FOR ONE THING!" _**smack**_ "WHY" _**smack**_ "CAN'T" _**smack**_ "YOU" _**smack**_ "JUST" _**smack**_ "DIE!"

I could no longer hold back my sobs, the pain was excruciating and I could feel the blood pouring down my back.

Vernon grabbed me and pulled me close. "This is all you will ever be good for, you little whore" he hissed, touching my chest then smacked me across the face when I tried to move away. When he was done, Vernon threw me to the ground and left me there.

I curled into a ball as the sobs came harder than before. I felt dirty. I felt so dirty. I knew other children have been touched far worse than I have, but I still felt so, so dirty.

I have been stuck with these monsters for ten years, ten miserable years. I had been with them since the day my parents died in a car crash

When I had first become Harry I had dreamed that some unknown relative would take me away, but they never did. I had no one.

"I want Momma...I want Papa." I whispered.

Hours later, when the sun had set and night had fallen, I crawled to where my shirt was, crying whenever my wounds stretched, and pulled it on. It was two a.m. before I gathered enough strength to leave the shed, and it took me another hour to bandage my wounds in the house and crawl to my cupboard.

I cried myself to sleep, and all the while, I still felt dirty.


	3. The Letter

**Ok, do not forget the poll. We have a lot of numbers, but if you don't vote the person you want, might not be the person Rowen falls in love with. **

**Oh and just so people know, ROWEN WILL NOT BE RAPED! I just wanted to point that out because of how the end of the last chapter was done. **

**Don't forget to review. I will take praise and flame. So, Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not claim ownership of Harry Potter, no matter how sexy the characters are, but I do claim ownership of Rowen so try and steal her, you will FEEL MY WRATH!**

["**Harry**"]

By the time my punishment was over, the summer holidays had started and Dudley had already destroyed half of his birthday presents, as well as knocked Mrs. Figgs over while he was on his racing bike.

I hate that school is out. It's not my favorite thing, but now Dudley and his friends can play Harry Hunting all they want.

It was why I always spent so much time out of the house. I couldn't wait till the holidays were over. Once that happened, I would be going to Stonewall High, which is far away from the "prestigious" Smelting's, where Dudley and Piers would be going.

"They stuff people's heads down the toilet the first day at Stonewall." Dudley told me one day. "Want to practice?" he said nastily. "No thanks." I said "The poor toilets never had anything as horrible as your fat head stuck down it. It might be sick." I said, and then ran before he could figure out what I had said.

One day in July I had to stay with Mrs. Figgs while Petunia took Dudley to London to buy his Smelting's uniform. She wasn't as bad as before, although I knew she still didn't like me that much. She did let me watch a little bit of TV though and she offered me stale chocolate cake. I didn't want it though. Who knows how long that has been there.

That evening, Dudley paraded around the living room for the family in his brand-new uniform. Smelting's' boys wore maroon tailcoats, orange knickerbockers, and flat straw hats called boaters. They also carried knobbly sticks, used for hitting each other while the teachers weren't looking. This was supposed to be good training for later life.

I knew Vernon said something about being proud and Petunia was crying over how handsome he looked, but I couldn't really pay attention. I was too busy trying to hide my laughing. I think I broke two ribs trying to hide it.

The next morning a horrible smell was coming from the kitchen. I was kind of nervous, wondering what Petunia was doing. When I walked in I saw that she had a metal tub in the sink with gray rags inside.

"What's this?" I asked, despite the rule. Her lips tightened, but she didn't hit me. "It's you school uniform." she said stiffly.

"I didn't realize it had to be so wet." I said, waiting for the hit, but it seems she didn't notice my sarcasm.

"Don't be stupid." she snapped. "I'm dying some of Dudley's old things gray for you. You'll look just like everyone else by the time I'm done."

I didn't even try to argue. I knew, that come the first day of school, I'd look like I'm wearing bits of old elephant skin. Dudley and Vernon wrinkled their noses at the smell when they came in, but sat down at the table.

Vernon opened the paper and Dudley banged his Smelting's stick on the table. Then we heard the click of the mail slot and the mail drop to the floor.

"Get the mail Dudley." Vernon said from behind the paper. "Make Harry get it." Dudley said.

"Get the mail boy." he said to me. I sighed, but again didn't argue. I knew I would just get hit by something.

When I did get to the mail I saw there were three items there. There was a postcard from Vernon's bitch of a sister, Marge, who was vacationing on the Isle of Wight, a bill, and…and a letter to me.

I stared wide-eyed down at the letter. No one had ever sent me anything in my entire life. I had no relatives or friends, and I didn't belong to the library so I never got any rude notes about overdue books.

Yet, it was right there. And it was addressed to me! It read

_**Mr. H. Potter  
The Cupboard under the Stairs  
4 Privet Drive  
Little Whinging  
Surrey**_

I looked back to the kitchen and then back to the letter. The envelope was thick and heavy, made of yellowish parchment, and the address was written in emerald-green ink. There was no stamp.  
Turning the envelope over, my hand trembling, I saw a purple wax seal bearing a coat of arms; a lion, an eagle, a badger, and a snake surrounding a large letter H.

Then I heard Vernon telling me to hurry up and make a stupid joke about letter bombs. In a spilt second, I stuffed the letter in my clothes and walked in the kitchen, giving Vernon the other two pieces of mail.

I was lost in my own little world. I barely heard Vernon inform Petunia about Marge and a whelk.

I couldn't pay attention to anything. It was like the letter hidden in my clothes was burning against my skin.

After I had washed the dishes I turned to Petunia.

"May I please go outside?" I asked politely. I knew I would be able to if I had done the dishes without being ordered to, and that I asked politely. She gave me a hard look, but nodded.

I slowly walked out of the kitchen and out the front door. When I was on the sidewalk though, I took off running towards the old park.

No one went to it anymore, now that the new one was built a year back. Almost all the paint was gone from the equipment, and everything was rusted. I liked it though I was able to have some time to myself, away from the Dursleys as well as Dudley and his gang.

I sat down on one of the swing and kicked my legs so it would swing only a little bit. The creaking brought me comfort.

For several minutes I sat there, trying to collect my thoughts, until finally I took out the letter. I slowly opened the letter and looked inside.

**HOGWARTS SCHOOL**  
**of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY**

I almost dropped the thing. Witchcraft? Wizardry? That was magic. Magic doesn't exist…right?

**Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore  
**_**(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,  
Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of**_** Wizards)**

This had to be a joke. Maybe Dudley put one of his older friends up to this. Then again, Dudley is too stupid to think up a prank like this.

**Dear Mr. Potter,  
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted  
at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please  
find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.  
Terms begins on September 1. We await your owl by no  
later than July 31.  
Yours sincerely,**

_**Minerva McGonagall**_**  
**_**Deputy**_** Headmistress**

I stared at it in shock. They await my owl? A school of magic?! How could this be? And more, importantly…if I was a witch- I mean, if I was a wizard…why couldn't I fight back?

Why couldn't my magic come out and show the Dursley's whose boss? Why couldn't my magic stop Vernon? Why couldn't my magic save me?

If it was true, maybe it was a mistake. Then I remembered.

The snake. The glass has vanished when I was angry. My teacher. I had turned her hair blue because I was upset she'd tell Vernon I had better grades then Dudley. My hair and the haircut. That sweater. The day I ended up on the roof.

All of these unexplainable things had happened when I was upset, or angry, or scared. Maybe…just maybe there was some truth to this letter.

How would I know though? Wait…it says it waits my owl. First off, owl? Second off…they would be awaiting my acceptance OR denial. If I didn't send either, someone would have to come and figure out why. I just had to wait.

I sighed, but got up and went back to Privet Drive. I had to make sure the Dursley's didn't discover the letter.

Yeah, that didn't work.

The next day three letters showed up in the most unusual places, but instead of getting angry Vernon and Petunia were so scared, they gave me Dudley's second bedroom. That actually made me feel better, but not for the reasons some would expect. I wanted to stay in my cupboard, it was safe, but if they gave me this bedroom it showed how scared they were. The letter, Hogwarts…it had to be real.

Every day it got worse and worse, and even I getting tired of them, although it was mostly because I had to pretend to not know what was inside the letter. But I was still excited, this just proved that it was real. Magic was real. And that the Dursley's were _wrong_.

However, on Sunday Vernon thought he could relax "No post on Sundays…no blasted letters." he said, only to have letters shooting out of the fireplace a moment later. Dozens and dozens of letters. To keep up the charade I leapt up and started trying to grab the letters in the air. Vernon grabbed me by the waist and threw me into the hallway.

He got Petunia and Dudley out of there as well and slammed the door shut. I could still hear letters coming out of the fireplace.

"That does it," said Uncle Vernon, trying to speak calmly but pulling great tufts out of his mustache at the same time. "I want you all back here in five minutes ready to leave. We're going away. Just pack some clothes. No arguments!" he shouted.

I complied, because I was kind of scared that he would take any left out anger on me. I'm still trying to recover from the snake incident. And that was in April over two months ago.

Ten minutes later we had wrenched our way through the boarded-up doors and were in the car, speeding down the highway. Dudley was sniffling in the back seat; his father had hit him round the head for holding them up while he tried to pack his television, VCR, and computer in his sports bag.

I was kind of thrilled about that. Taste of his own medicine.

Every now and then Uncle Vernon would take a sharp turn and drive in the opposite direction for a while. "Shake'em off... shake 'em off," he would mutter whenever he did this. I knew he was close to the breaking .

That night we stayed at a dingy hotel, the next day a hundred letters were delivered to me as we had been eating stale corn flakes and cold tinned tomatoes on toast. Vernon went back on his mad driving mission to get us away from "them".

At nightfall, Vernon had taken us to this weird island hut thing by a dingy boat and had us all inside as it began to rain. The "rations" he had gotten us were four bags of chips and four bananas. I only got a banana and Dudley got my bag of chips.

Vernon tried to make a fire with the empty chip bags but all they did was smoke and shriveled up. "Could do with some of those letters now, eh?" he said cheerfully. He was in a very good mood.

He probably was assuming that they wouldn't be able to find us. I smirked behind his bag. If they had gone to such lengths before, a dingy island was not going to stop these people. Not when they had magic.

When everyone was in bed, and I was on the cold floor, under the moldiest and thinnest blanket I heard something creek outside. I prayed it wasn't the roof, it would be terrible if it were to cave in on us right before I was to go to Hogwarts. I

I looked to Dudley's watch and saw it was five minutes before midnight.

Four minutes to go. I wonder how many letters were in the Dursley's home by now. What if they were still going? That would be a laugh.

Three minutes to go. Was that sound the sea on the rocks? Or something else?

Two minutes to go. What was that funny crunching noise? The rocks?

One minute to go and I would be eleven. Maybe I should wake Dudley, just to annoy him?

Ten…nine…eight…seven…six…five…four…three…two…one…

_BOOM_!

I shoot off the ground and looked to the door. Someone was outside, knocking on the door.

I couldn't help but smile. They were here.


	4. A New Friend

**So here we go this is the last chapter I needed to redo. The reason why it is chapter four though is because last time I had made the vanishing glass chapter two chapters, instead of only doing one like I did in this redo. So the next chapter will be the one for Diagon Alley, what I have written for the first time.**

**If you haven't realized it yet, a lot is from the book, but it all won't be. It's more like a guideline for me, but a lot of it, I feel is important so some of it I typed word for word from the book, but changing it to go along with this story line. That's also why I fixed the disclaimer to say 'Harry Potter series'.**

**Do not forget to vote on the poll! And review! Will accept praise and flame!**

**Oh and again I want to thank GoldenPhoenix823 for fixing all this. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not claim ownership of the Harry Potter series, no matter how sexy the characters are, but I do claim ownership of Rowen. Try and take her, you will FEEL MY WRATH!**

**["Harry"]**

_BOOM!_

They knocked again. Dudley jerked awake and muttered stupidly about a cannon.

I stood up and looked at the door with a smile on my face. I wondered what a magical person looked like.

All of a sudden there was a crash behind us and Vernon came skidding across the floor, a rifle clutched in his meaty hands. I now knew what that package he had earlier was. I wasn't worried. The magical person wouldn't let him use it on me.

"Who's there?" Vernon shouted. "I warn you! I'm armed!" he tried to threaten. Would a gun be able to harm a magical person?

There was a pause, then-

_SMASH_!

The door fell to the ground. I gasped at the man in the doorway. His face was almost completely hidden by a long, shaggy mane of hair and a wild, tangled beard, but you could make out his eyes, glinting like black beetles under all of the hair. Unlike the Dursley's though, I wasn't afraid of him, despite his size, he didn't look all that scary.

The man entered the hut then fixed the doorway before turning to us.

"Couldn't make us a cup o' tea, could yeh? It's not been an easy journey..." he said. When no one said anything, he walked over to the couch and looked down at Dudley, who sat frozen in fear.

"Budge up, yeh great lump." The man said. Dudley squeaked in fear and ran over to hide behind Petunia and Vernon who were cowering in the corner.

"An' here's Harry!" the giant said. I looked to him, not caring if he thought I was Harry. I saw that he was smiling though. He was happy to see me!

"Las' time I saw you, you was only a baby," said the giant. "Yeh look a lot like yet dad, but yeh've got yet mom's eyes." He said. My heart soared. I finally knew something about my parents. And the best part was, that I had my mom's eyes.

Then Vernon ruined it by speaking.

"I demand that you leave at once sir!" he shouted. "You are breaking and entering!"

"Ah, shut up, Dursley, yeh great prune," The giant said before going over, taking the gun, and bending the gun into a knot, before throwing it in the corner. I smiled wide at the look of fear on Vernon's face.

"Anyway - Harry," the giant said "A very happy birthday to yeh. Got summat fer yeh here - I mighta sat on it at some point, but it'll taste all right," the man pulled a box from one of the numerous pockets on his coat and handed it to me.

With shaking hands I opened the box and gasped. Tears were beginning to form but I forced them back.

Inside was a large sticky chocolate cake with the words 'Happy Birthday Harry' written on it in green icing. I had never had a birthday cake before.

"T-Thank you…"I began to say, but then realized I didn't know this man's name. I looked to him. "I'm sorry. I don't know your name." I told him, but I wasn't scared to apologize to him. I knew this man wouldn't hit me. I was safe with him. The man only chuckled.

"True, I haven't introduced meself. Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts." The man, Hagrid, explained.

He held out his hand to me, but when he shook it, he shook my whole arm.

"What about that tea then, eh?" he said, rubbing his hands together. "I'd not say no ter summat stronger if yeh've got it, mind." I giggled."I'm sorry. I don't have anything to make tea with." I told him politely. He just ruffled my hair and that made me smile. I always saw Vernon do that to Dudley and I always wondered how that would feel from someone who seems to actually care. It felt nice.

When he saw the empty chip bags inside of the fireplace he snorted. I watched as he started the fire out of nothing then pulled several items from his pockets. Soon enough there was a kettle of tea whistling and several fat juicy sausages were cooking over the fire. When he slid the first six sausages off the poker I heard Dudley whimper.

"Don't touch anything he gives you, Dudley." Vernon said. Hagrid chuckled darkly.

"Yer great puddin' of a son don' need fattenin' anymore, Dursley, don' worry." Hagrid said, he then gave me some of the sausages. They were the best thing I had ever eaten in my entire life.

"These are delicious Mr. Hagrid. What exactly do you do again?" I asked. He smiled. "Call me Hagrid," he said, "everyone does. An' like I told yeh, I'm Keeper of Keys at Hogwarts, yeh'll know all about Hogwarts, o' course." He finished.

"Um…actually, I don't know much." I told him. He looked at me shocked. "I only know a little from the letter." I explained.

"Lies!" Vernon shouted. "You never read the letter, we made sure."

"What?" Hagrid shouted.

"But I did." I said, standing up and looking to him, being brave for once. Vernon stared at me in shock. "The day before you saw the letters, one came in the mail. I hid it before you could see it and read it in the park. I've been waiting almost a month for this day to come." I told him. Vernon looked like a gaping whale. I turned to Hagrid.

"I'm sorry, I don't know much about magic." I told him.

"Sorry!" he yelled, looking to the Dursley's who were cowering in the corner. "It' s them who should be sorry! I knew yeh weren't gettin' yer letters but I never thought yeh wouldn't even know abou' Hogwarts, fer cryin' out loud! Did yeh never wonder where yet parents learned it all?"

I looked at him wide-eyed. "M-My parents were magical too?" I asked him in shock. Hagrid looked as if he was about to explode. "DURSLEY!" he boomed. Vernon, who had gone very pale, whispered something that sounded like "Mimblewimble."

Hagrid stared wildly at me "But yeh must know about yet mom and dad," he said, desperately. "I mean, they're famous. You're famous."

"They were?" I asked, then turned to the Dursley's. "You-You told me they were unemployed losers!" I shouted.

A braver man than Vernon Dursley would have quailed under the furious look Hagrid now gave him; when Hagrid spoke, his every syllable trembled with rage. "You never told him? Never told him what was in the letter Dumbledore left fer him? I was there! I saw Dumbledore leave it, Dursley! An' you've kept it from him all these years?"

"Please." I told Hagrid who looked to me. "I know I'm a wit-wizard. I've figured that out. But please…why are my parents famous? Why am I famous?" I asked.

I needed to know. Every lie the Dursley's had told me was coming undone. I desperately needed to know the truth, no matter how bad it is.

"Gallopin' Gorgons, that reminds me," said Hagrid, clapping a hand to his forehead with enough force to knock over a cart horse, and from yet another pocket inside his overcoat he pulled an owl, a real, live, rather ruffled-looking owl, a long quill, and a roll of parchment.  
With his tongue between his teeth he scribbled a note that I could read upside down:

_Dear Professor Dumbledore,  
Found Harry. Taking him to buy his things tomorrow.  
Weather's horrible. Hope you're Well.  
Hagrid_

He then sent the owl into the storm, with the message.

"Where was I?" Hagrid asked. I was about to remind him, but Vernon had gotten his courage back. "

He's not going to that school." Vernon said gruffly.

"I'd like ter see a great Muggle like you stop him," Hagrid said.

"Muggle?" I asked, knowing I heard that somewhere before.

"A Muggle," said Hagrid, "it's what we call nonmagic folk like thern. An' it's your bad luck you grew up in a family o' the biggest Muggles I ever laid eyes on."

"We swore when we took him in we'd put a stop to that rubbish," Vernon said, following with, "swore we'd stamp it out of him! Wizard indeed!"

"You knew!" I shouted. The others turned to me as I glared at Vernon. "You knew the entire time what I could do, and why!" I shouted. They knew! They knew and they still punished me!

"Knew!" Petunia shrieked. "Knew! Of course we knew! How could you not be, my dratted sister being what she was? Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that-that school-and came home every vacation with her pockets full of frog spawn, turning teacups into rats. I was the only one who saw her for what she was- a freak! But for my mother and father, oh no, it was Lily this and Lily that, they were proud of having a witch in the family!"

She stopped to draw a deep breath and then went ranting on. It seemed she had wanted to say all this for years. I was only staring at her wide-eyed.

"Then she met that Potter at school and they left and got married and had you, and of course I knew you'd be just the same, just as strange, just as-as-abnormal, and then, if you please, she went and got herself blown up and we got landed with you!" she ended with.

I gasped and looked her at her wide-eyed, Soft tears now going down my cheeks. I had gone white and for a few minutes I couldn't find my voice.

When I did, all I could choke up was, "B-Blown up…b-but you said…you said they died in a car crash…" I whispered, but Hagrid still heard it.

"CAR CRASH!" roared Hagrid, jumping up so angrily that the Dursleys scuttled back to their corner. "How could a car crash kill Lily an' James Potter? It's an outrage! A scandal! Harry Potter not knowin' his own story when every kid in our world knows his name!" Hagrid finished.

I looked at him wide-eyed.

Lily and James. Those were my parents' names. I finally knew their names.

"Why? Why are we famous Hagrid?" I asked, begging him to tell me. I needed to know.

The anger faded from Hagrid's face. He looked suddenly anxious. "I never expected this," he said, in a low, worried voice. "I had no idea, when Dumbledore told me there might be trouble gettin' hold of yeh, how much yeh didn't know. Ah, Harry, I don' know if I'm the right  
person ter tell yeh - but someone's gotta - yeh can't go off ter Hogwarts not knowin'."

He threw a dirty look at the Dursleys. I continued to stare at him.

"Well, it's best yeh know as much as I can tell yeh - mind, I can't tell yeh everythin', it's a great myst'ry, parts of it..." He sat down, stared into the fire for a few seconds, and then said, "It  
begins, I suppose, with - with a person called - but it's incredible yeh don't know his name, everyone in our world knows -" "Who? " I asked, interrupting him. I sat down on the floor, near him and looked up to him.

"Well - I don' like sayin' the name if I can help it. No one does."

"Why not?" I asked. I needed to know everything. Now.

"Gulpin' gargoyles, Harry, people are still scared. Blimey, this is difficult. See, there was this wizard who went... bad. As bad as you could go. Worse. Worse than worse. His name was..."  
Hagrid gulped, but no words came out.

"Could you write it down?" I suggested, feeling sorry for my new friend.

"Nah -can't spell it. All right - Voldemort. " Hagrid shuddered. "Don' make me say it again. Anyway, this - this wizard, about twenty years ago now, started lookin' fer followers. Got 'em, too - some were afraid, some just wanted a bit o' his power, 'cause he was gettin' himself power, all right. Dark days, Harry. Didn't know who ter trust, didn't dare get friendly with strange wizards or witches... terrible things happened. He was takin' over. 'Course, some stood up to him - an' he killed 'em. Horribly. One o' the only safe places left was Hogwarts. Reckon Dumbledore's the only one You-Know-Who was afraid of. Didn't dare try takin' the school, not jus' then, anyway."

I looked to Hagrid, shocked at the beginning of this tale. If Dumbledore was the only one that Voldemort was afraid of, and I did go to Hogwarts, I was comforted by the thought of being safe there.

"Now, yer mum an' dad were as good a witch an' wizard as I ever knew. Head boy an' girl at Hogwarts in their day! Suppose the myst'ry is why You-Know-Who never tried to get 'em on his side before... probably knew they were too close ter Dumbledore ter want anythin' ter do with the Dark Side."

I smiled. I was finally learning some stuff about my parents. True stuff. They weren't drunk lowlifes. They were good.

"Maybe he thought he could persuade 'em... maybe he just wanted 'em outta the way. All anyone knows is, he turned up in the village where you was all living, on Halloween ten years ago. You was just a year old. He came ter yer house an' - an' -" Hagrid suddenly pulled out a very dirty, spotted handkerchief and blew his nose with a sound like a foghorn. I scooted closer.

"Sorry," he said. "But it's that sad - knew yer mum an' dad, an' nicer people yeh couldn't find - anyway..." He took a deep breath and continued his story.

"You-Know-Who killed 'em. An' then - an' this is the real myst'ry of the thing - he tried to kill you, too. Wanted ter make a clean job of it, I suppose, or maybe he just liked killin' by then. But he couldn't do it. Never wondered how you got that mark on yer forehead? That was no ordinary cut. That's what yeh get when a Powerful, evil curse touches yeh - took care of yer mum an' dad an' yer house, even - but it didn't work on you, an' that's why yer famous, Harry. No one ever lived after he decided ter kill 'em, no one except you, an' he'd killed some o' the best witches an' wizards of the age - the McKinnons, the Bones, the Prewetts - an' you was only a baby, an' you lived."

Something very painful was going on in my mind. As Hagrid's story came to a close, I saw again the blinding flash of green light, more clearly than I had ever remembered it before - and I remembered something else, for the first time in my life: a high, cold, cruel laugh. That wasn't the light of a car. That was the light that killed my parents. That laugh was Voldemort's. That was my parents' murderer. Tears were falling down my face again, but I made no sound.

Hagrid was watching me sadly.

"Took yeh from the ruined house myself, on Dumbledore's orders. Brought yeh ter this lot..." he said, but it sounded like it was shame. He must regret bringing me here. I slowly put a hand on his despite knowing that boys don't do that. I don't care right now.

"Load of old tosh!" Vernon shouted, making me jump. It seems he got his voice back.

"Now, you listen here, boy," he snarled, "I accept there's something strange about you, and as for all this about your parents, well, they were weirdos, no denying it, and the world's better off without them in my opinion - asked for all they got, getting mixed up with these wizarding types - just what I expected, always knew they'd come to a sticky end -" Hagrid didn't have to jump up, because I did and I glared at that man.

I didn't care if I was punished later. I had enough.

"Shut up." I hissed at him. He looked at me in shock. "You will shut up for once in your miserable old life you whale of a man. And if you dare insult my parents ever again, you will wish that man had killed me." I threatened. Vernon was now in the corner again with the rest of his pathetic family.

I took a few seconds to calm down, before turning to Hagrid "Whatever did happen to Vol, I mean You-Know-Who?"

"Good question, Harry. Disappeared. Vanished. Same night he tried ter kill you. Makes yeh even more famous. That's the biggest myst'ry, see... he was gettin' more an' more powerful - why'd he go?" he began. I nodded and walked over to Hagrid.

"Some say he died. Codswallop, in my opinion. Dunno if he had enough human left in him to die. Some say he's still out there, bidin' his time, like, but I don' believe it. People who was on his side came back ter ours. Some of 'em came outta kinda trances. Don' reckon they could've done if he was comin' back." I nodded again.

"Most of us reckon he's still out there somewhere but lost his powers. Too weak to carry on. 'Cause somethin' about you finished him, Harry. There was somethin' goin' on that night he hadn't counted on - I dunno what it was, no one does - but somethin' about you stumped him, all  
right." He finished with warmth and respect, directed at me.

I stayed silent. Now that I knew the truth, that I was magical, I didn't know what to do. I looked to Vernon. "You'll have to tell Stonewall I'm not coming. I'm going to Hogwarts, where I belong." I told him. Hagrid smiled at me in pride.

But Vernon wasn't going to give in without a fight. "Haven't I told you, you're not going?" he hissed. "You are going to Stonewall High and you'll be grateful for it. I've read those letters and you need all sorts of rubbish - spell books and wands and -"

"If he wants ter go, a great Muggle like you won't stop him," growled Hagrid. "Stop Lily an' James Potter' s son goin' ter Hogwarts! Yer mad. His name's been down ever since he was born. He's off ter the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry in the world. Seven years there and he won't know himself. He'll be with youngsters of his own sort, fer a change, an' he'll be under the greatest headmaster Hogwarts ever had Albus Dumbled-"

"I AM NOT PAYING FOR SOME CRACKPOT OLD FOOL TO TEACH HIM MAGIC TRICKS!" yelled Vernon.

He had gone too far. Hagrid seized his umbrella and pointed it at them.

"NEVER. INSULT. ALBUS. DUMBLEDORE. IN. FRONT. OF. ME!" he thundered. He brought it down on Dudley and instantly he had sprouted a pig's tail. With shrieks of terror, all three of them ran into the bedroom and hid. I laughed and looked to Hagrid, happily.

Hagrid looked down at his umbrella and stroked his beard. "Shouldn'ta lost me temper," he said ruefully, "but it didn't work anyway. Meant ter turn him into a pig, but I suppose he was so much like a pig anyway there wasn't much left ter do." I nodded in agreement.

He cast a sideways look at me under his bushy eyebrows.

"Be grateful if yeh didn't mention that ter anyone at Hogwarts," he said. "I'm - er - not supposed ter do magic, strictly speakin'. I was allowed ter do a bit ter follow yeh an' get yer letters to yeh an' stuff - one o' the reasons I was so keen ter take on the job"

"Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" I asked, but he looked away from me.

"Oh, well - I was at Hogwarts meself but I - er - got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wand in half an' everything. But Dumbledore let me stay on as gamekeeper. Great man, Dumbledore." "Why were you expelled?" I asked, but I saw pain flash through his eyes for a spilt second.

"It's gettin' late and we've got lots ter do tomorrow," Hagrid said. "Gotta get up ter town, get all yer books an' that."

He took off his thick black coat and threw it to me. "You can kip under that," he said. "Don' mind if it wriggles a bit, I think I still got a couple o' dormice in one o' the pockets." I nodded and laid down on the floor again.

I was okay with it this time, because of the coat, warmth surrounded me. For once, I fell into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

It was bliss…


End file.
